


Betty Drabbles

by annalyia



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Gift Fic, Mass Effect Holiday Special
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-15
Updated: 2017-01-15
Packaged: 2018-09-17 19:06:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9338879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/annalyia/pseuds/annalyia
Summary: this is a bunch of lil drabbles that I did for the Mass Effect holiday cheer on tumblr for bettydice!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bettydice (BettyKnight)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BettyKnight/gifts).



“You’re just the cutest thing I have ever seen,” Shepard croons, nuzzling her nose against that of the hamster in her hands.  “I’ll take him!” she says to the shopkeeper, beaming as she hands the rodent back to the asari, who deposits him into a small cage before giving him to Shepard. 

“Thank you for your purchase, Commander,” she says with a smile.

Shepard nods, grin still wide on her face, and turns on her heel, strolling away from the shop and towards the transit center – it simply won’t do to not take the little guy back to the Normandy straight away.  She brings the cage close to her face as she waits for the car to arrive, cooing at the hamster. 

“Uh, Shepard, didn’t we come to the Citadel for a meeting?” Garrus places a hand on her shoulder, jolting her back to reality.

“Yes, we did,” she quips, “but, as you can see here, this is a living, breathing creature and I have to get it back to the Normandy ASAP.  The Citadel is no place for a majestic animal such as this.”  She dismisses Garrus without really looking at him.  “That meeting can’t start without us anyway, so there’s no harm in taking this little guy up to my cabin and getting him situated beforehand.  I _am_ Commander Shepard, after all.”

Garrus sighs.  “You most definitely are,” he mutters before turning to Tali, who just sort of shrugs. 

“Aha!”  Shepard’s eyes light up and she turns to her companions.  “Hamlet!” she says excitedly.  “Get it?  Because he’s a hamster and the play is Hamlet and they both have ‘ham’ in the name?  Isn’t it just the perfect name for him?”  She stares at them, eagerly awaiting their responses.

Fortunately, the car arrives right then, saving Tali and Garrus from having to fumble their words around enough to sound like they agreed with Shepard’s name choice for her new companion. 

The ride back to the Normandy is filled with Shepard sweet-talking Hamlet and completely ignoring her alien friends.  Once on the Normandy, Shepard makes a beeline for her cabin.  There, she sets Hamlet’s cage on one of the shelves before removing her armor and changing into her significantly more comfortable Cerberus clothes. 

“Finally,” she says, sticking her hand into the cage and allowing Hamlet to crawl into her palm.  She gently pulls him out and brushes their noses together again before giving him a peck to the top of his head.  Sitting down, she sets Hamlet on the floor in front of her, watching him scurry around his new home, a pleased smile on her face.


	2. Chapter 2

Thane doesn’t really pay attention to where his hands travel.  He simply runs them up and down Shepard’s arms, thighs, through her hair, whatever he can reach.  It’s a completely innocent touch, just to feel and know that she is there.  That she is real.

That this is real.

His hand slowly travels up her thigh and ghosts against her side and – she starts and lets out a quiet gasp.  Thane quickly removes his hand and says, “are you all right, siha?”

“What?  Oh, yes, I’m fine, Thane.  I’m just a little ticklish on my sides.”

Thane furrows his eyebrows together.  Ticklish?  What a strange concept.  Maybe it is because humans have such squishy skin.  “What does that mean, siha?” he asks.

Shepard adjusts so as to see Thane better, taking her head out of his lap and resting it against the pillow by the arm of the couch, but she remains lying down.  “It means just that,” she says.  “I’m ticklish.”  When he doesn’t reply, she says, “I guess it just means that if you touch me on my sides or under my arms or the bottoms of my feet or behind my knees it tickles.  I squirm and laugh and, honestly, it’s kind of awful.”

“I see,” Thane says. 

Shepard nods and readjusts herself, laying her head once again in Thane’s lap, curled up on the couch content to watch the vid she chose. 

Thane rests his hand on her shoulder, careful not to touch her in one of those many so-called ticklish spots that she named.  He does his best to turn his attention back to the vid – another one of those human plays acted out by elcor.  He’s not entirely sure as to why Shepard likes them so much, but he never complains when she asks to watch one because he treasures every moment he has with her, no matter how silly.

But, of course, his concentration wavers and he glances down at her.  He notices many of her tickle spots are defenseless and wonders just how ticklish his siha is. 

He oh-so-slowly moves his hand to her side again and just rests it there. 

She doesn’t move.

He gently runs his finger along her side.

The same gasp and twitch from before.

He repeats the movements.

“Thane,” her voice is low and her tone cautious, “what are you doing?”

“Oh, nothing, siha,” he says nonchalantly before moving his fingers to under her arm and trying to tickle her there.

She gasps again and shoots up, scooting to the other end of the couch and away from him.  “What.  Are.  You.  Doing.”

Grinning, Thane swiftly reaches over and grabs both her sides with his hands and begins tickling her mercilessly.  “Nothing, siha, can’t you tell?”  One hand moves to under her arm and he is rewarded with a squeal as Shepard tries to worm away from his hands.  “Is something wrong?” he calmly asks as he continues his assault.

Shepard squeaks and squirms, tears forming in her eyes as she laughs and does her best to escape Thane’s grasp.  “Yes, something is wrong!” she manages to say between gasps, still trying to get away but to no avail.  The drell is rather strong.  He looms over her as she lies on the couch, unable to do anything other than be tickled.

Finally, eventually, after what feels like a lifetime to Shepard, Thane stops.  One hand moves to her face, brushing her hair behind her ear before coming to rest against her soft cheek, the other absentmindedly fiddles with the hem of her shirt.  Their faces are very, very close, so Shepard leans up just a bit and brushes their lips together.  “Never do that again, Thane,” she tells him, still mostly breathless.

“I can make no such promises, siha,” he says, kissing her.


	3. Chapter 3

Shepard and Garrus lean against the railing in front of them, a respectful distance between them, watching the ships dock at and leave the Citadel. 

“Cortez was right,” Shepard says.  “This really is relaxing.”

Garrus slides a little closer to her, making the distance a tad less respectful.  “It’s also interesting to see what kind of ships are in use during war times.”

She nods.  “Mhm.”  Her hand absentmindedly finds his and she traces the outlines of his scales.  “It’s an interesting time we live in,” she notes before placing a chaste kiss to his mandible, causing it to flare almost imperceptibly. 

And so they stand there, watching the ships come and go from the Citadel.  Shepard tells Garrus more about the human cargo ships they see and their design, and Garrus does the same for the turian warships.  They notice that both species – every species – have too many ships that carry large amounts of people. 

“It’s a damn shame,” Shepard says quietly – she doesn’t want anyone other than Garrus to hear her.  “We shouldn’t have to be doing this.  We shouldn’t have to fight for everything that we know and love.  Innocent people shouldn’t be dying by the truckloads.”  Her shoulders slump and she suddenly feels the weight of the war.  “I should be able to do more,” she whispers.

Garrus frowns slightly and closes the space between them, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her close for just a moment before letting her go.  “You’re doing the best that you can, Shepard – we all are,” he says, staring at the ships.  “There’s not much more that you can do against a supposedly unstoppable ancient force.”

Sighing, she shakes her head.  “But we know that they aren’t unstoppable,” she says.  “We have the Crucible and we know that it can work.”  She lets out a huff.  “I just wish it was easier to make everyone work together.”

Garrus laughs and says, “now, Shepard, there’s no use hoping for impossible things to happen.”


	4. Chapter 4

Jack grins as she plops herself down on the floor of the Normandy’s observation deck, a few loose hairs from her ponytail falling in her face.  “Shit, Shep, this is the best use of a break I could ever think of,” she says excitedly, pulling a deck of cards out of God-knows-where. “Who wants in?” she asks. 

Shepard sits down next to Jack.  “Uh, me, I guess.”

Traynor places herself on Shepard’s other side.  “I love a good poker game,” she says.

Miranda sits by Traynor and merely nods to Jack to be dealt in.

Tali lies down on the floor by Miranda.  “It sounds like fun!”

Liara chooses to sit on Jack’s right – Tali’s left – with a, “what kind of poker, though?  Are we going to play a human version or something from another species?”

“We’re going to be playing a simple human type of poker,” she says.  “It’s called five card draw.”  Her grin turns mischievous.  “But instead of playing with credits, we’re playing strip poker.  Whoever wins the round gets to decide which person removes which article of clothing.”

Amid all the groans from her crewmates, Shepard silently says a prayer of thanks for the number of layers she’s wearing – a hoodie, a t-shirt, and an undershirt. 

Tali raises her hand.  “I can’t exactly take my suit off,” she says. 

“Well, then you can play with credits,” Jack replies.  “The rest of you fuckers, on the other hand, are all gonna be naked by the time this game is over.”

After explaining the rules, Jack deals out the first hand.

Shepard looks at what she has – two queens, an ace, a three, and a seven. 

Okay, not too bad.                                                                          

She hands the three and the seven – face-down, of course – to Jack and draws two new cards. 

An ace and a three!

Shepard does her best not to smirk and break her poker face and instead just waits for the rest of the players to figure out their hands. 

“All right,” Jack says, “lay your cards down.”

As Shepard does, she notices none of her companions have nearly as good a hand as she does.  “I believe this one goes to me,” she says. 

“Nice one, Shep,” Jack says.  The others also commend Shepard on her hand, but are significantly more nervous about it.  “Now, choose whose clothes are gone.”

Shepard takes in her friend’s outfits.  Unfortunately, none of them seem to be as lucky as her.  Most everything appears to be in one piece, or at least like it’d take a damned long time to remove anything.  “Um, is your belt actually attached to your suit?” she asks Miranda.

“No,” she replies.  “Thankfully, it’s just for looks.”

Shepard nods.  “Okay, then, uh, take that off.”

Miranda purses her lips but does as Shepard says, removing the belt and placing it on the floor next to her. 

Jack snorts.  “Thanks for trying to take out the cheerleader, Commander,” she says.

“Go to Hell,” is Miranda’s reply.

The next round, Shepard doesn’t do nearly as well.  Tali is the winner with three queens and two fours – a full house.  Without a second thought the quarian tells Traynor to take off her boots; a rather strange request according to everyone else, but Tali assures them she knows what she’s doing.  Shepard assumes it’s because Tali has no desire to see any of her teammates in less clothing than usual.

It keeps going like this – next, Shepard is told by Jack to lose her jacket, leaving her a little colder than before.  Traynor wins the following round and Jack has to undo the ties from her shirt around her waist.  “I wanted to see those lovely tattoos better,” Traynor informs them with a wink. 

Somehow, Liara wins the next two rounds and Miranda finds herself without gloves – which none of them knew was possible – and Tali 50 fewer credits than before. 

Much to the chagrin of everyone, Jack wins the next three rounds.  Shepard has to remove her boots – showing off her adorable dinosaur and krogan socks – Traynor is left in her rather lacy seafoam green bra, and everyone now knows what Liara looks like without her coat. 

However, Jack doesn’t do nearly as well for the next four rounds – her jacket, belt, boots, and socks are all gone.  “Well fuckin’ played, you shitters,” she says, with a wide trademark grin.

And so the game goes – hours and hours, as far as Shepard can tell – until, somehow, all of them have ended up in the same situation in which they are clothed in only their pants and their bra.

Except for Tali, but she _is_ down two thousand credits. 

Shepard takes in her companions.  Jack is wearing what could maybe be considered a bra if absolutely necessary – it’s a simple piece of cloth the same shade of white as her shirt.  Liara has some sort of leather-y thing that simply can’t be comfortable.  Miranda’s is tasteful – a dark brown with the slightest hint of lace that is just enticing enough.  Shepard feels a light blush creep up her face as she realizes that she is the only person here wearing a sports bra.

However, before anyone can comment, the door slides open and in walks James with a “Hey, Commander, are you—”

His eyes grow very wide and his cheeks flush a very dark red and his mouth opens in a very small o.  “I, uh, guess that you, um, are, uh, busy,” he stutters before turning around and walking back out of the lounge. 

It takes only a few seconds before Shepard and her friends burst into real, hearty laughter. 


End file.
